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Have You Ever...

10/3/2012

3 Comments

 
My first experience with the lovely 'Have you ever...' game turned sour real quick.  Spring Break; Rocky Point, Mexico; drinking; group of friends; new relationship with Sam; new revealing news; lovers quarrel; awkwardness for friends.  Let's move on. 

Explaining all the newness in my life is impossible; but I know a fun game we can play.  ¡Here we go!

Have You Ever....

Sweated so bad at 7:15 in the morning that you couldn't put face lotion on?

Had a whole grocery isle of Tequila to choose from?

Had an employer who also employs a person to take care of the restroom (literally stand in it all day)?...and
had a Mexico bathroom 'blow-out' while this person is right outside the door? She always smiles and politely says adios when I leave; she has even handed me some toilet paper under the door.

Been in the middle of getting a pedicure before you realized you very well could be in a whore-house? I learned some dirty, dirty Spanish words from these ladies!

Had a 9 piece traditional band (sound system and all) play until 4 a.m on the street corner on a Monday night? Had a snare drum banging on the street corner until 4 a.m on a Sunday night? Had a jukebox and speakers set up on the street corner playing everything from Mariachi to Bob Marley all weekend long; until the wee hours of the morning? 'Never-Never Land' in Salt Lake City couldn't top this!

Made a left turn from the right hand side of the road, crossing four lanes of highway (every time you need to make a left turn while driving)?  Welcome to driving in Mexico!

Had 'Sw-ass' or 'Sw-ussy' for two months straight?

Had to listen for the shout of 'ciel' or 'gas' echoing down the street, in order to get gas or drinking water for your house?

Been called a dirty gringo or verga sucia (this is a fun one to translate) by other surfers? I can devote a whole blog to how 'Small Time' the local surf scene is in Sayulita.

Put lime and chile on everything you eat?

Had to avoid so many tire popping, axle crunching, car destroying pot holes while driving?

Wished that you paid more attention to the vosotros form of Spanish?

Lived on a street that has no street...rather a jungle trail with small stairs winding up/down the hill?

Checked the bed each night, before crawling in, for scorpions?

Been so happy to drink a Hornsby Apple Cider? Thanks Lindsay!

Had a neighbor who let their dog into your backyard to take a dump, and not pick it up?

Had ocean view sunsets from your sofa?

Been forced to try 8 different home-made hot sauces while eating at a taco stand (chocolate, mango, cilantro, tamarindo, coconut...you get the picture)?

Had mold grow on your shoes after not wearing them for a week?

Had a student's mom offer to pay for you to go meet the former Mexican President and Deepak Chopra?

Shopped at Walmart for biodegradable cleaning products?

Seen winter parkas; fur and all, within arms distance from the bikinis? Paris Hilton would love this shit!

Not even flinched at a truck full of men and teen-aged boys with machine guns and masks?

Experienced kirtan with a room full of Mexican hippies and new-agers?

Had neighbors on your left who have tarps for roofs and neighbors to the right with mansions?

Scuba dived in the ocean without every taking a lesson?

Put on a hoodie and jeans when the temperature dropped to 79 degrees?

Eaten so many frikin' beans and corn tortillas?

Attended a virtual-bbq?...can't wait till the next one!

Had a mouse, wasps, cockroaches, dragonflies, mosquitoes, moths, butterflies, cutter ants, two fighting cats, centipedes, huge fuzzy spiders, magets, ticks, and caterpillars in your house; all in the same week?

Been surrounded by people who are not ashamed of what they have to do to make a buck or what they look like; and are so genuinely happy and alive?

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A lesson in life from a child; it is all perspective.
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The other side of the isle is wine and rum. My hardest choices in life...which bathing suit to wear and what kind of cold cocktail do I want to drink.
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My nightly view; pirate ship & islas marietas
3 Comments
Kathy Uber
10/3/2012 01:31:04 pm

Do I need to bring ear plugs?

Reply
Jillian Stanford
10/11/2012 06:08:42 am

this. is. amazing.

Reply
Keri
10/12/2012 12:40:25 am

Agh! Just reading this. Can't wait to be part of some of these adventures! (Except maybe the scorpions).

Reply

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