Feeling Tipsy

One of the greatest joys of living in Mexico is the incredible service you can receive.  For example, the Ciel-man; our bottled water guy.  I was lying on the sofa this afternoon and I heard the sweet, harmonious tones of his cry...'cieeelll' being carried by the breeze down the jungle footpath leading to our house.  I jumped up, ran to the door and yelled out the door 'Buenas Tardes'. He responded from atop of the stairs, 'Cuantas' (how many); and then he quickly brought the bottles of water down the decrepit brick stairs, and into my kitchen.  Taking away the empties.  Now this is a guy that you want to come back, so you tip him for his service; the better you tip, the more frequently he will bob-up.  If I were to have any job for a day, it would be the ciel delivery woman...trying to master the art of the call.  But I find it doubtful that I would pass the auditions; for I have tried to imitate the call and just don't have what it takes.  Damn, this guy is good.  Totally off topic, but the appropriate time to clarify...I would also enjoy being the 'bus buddy' who collects money from the people when they get on the bus, hangs out the open door of the moving bus shouting to entice passengers onto his bus, and blows his whistle to warn the driver of how much space he has between his vehicle and other objects; as he flies down the street.  Although, I would have to leave Mexico for this job...the drivers here manage all the work by themselves.

I am equally in love with the parking guy who helps me to parallel park my car along the curb, each time I stop for tacos on the way home from surfing.  Although I don't need any assistance; based upon the uphill, left-hand side of the narrow street park job I managed last week.  However, I continue to roll down my window and allow him to help me.  He tells me to turn my wheel; or at least that is what I imagine that he would be saying, rather he informs me by blowing an assortment of whistles which lead me effortlessly back into my parking space.  For the right amount of centavos, he will wash our car and even stick around and watch our surfboards.

2008 Cartagena, Colombia

A little too much service by the ladies on the beach

On the contrary, one of the biggest headaches of living in Mexico is the shit-ass service you can receive.  For example, you need the internet company to come out to your house; you call and they give you a 'ticket'.  The internet company then gives you an approximation of when they will come to your house for repairs; typically sometime within the next 168 hours.  If you are not home, they leave a note on the door and you start the process all over again. 

Therefore, knowing who to tip is really important.  Day-by-day our list grows; and I will not bore you with the mundane details of how I tip the grocery bag boys, the gas attendants, the person dressed up as a clown juggling at the red light at an intersection; or anyone else who is trying to make a decent peso by offering to make my chill-ass life a little more pathetically easy (or entertaining).

I will, however, introduce you to the newest beneficiary of my hard earned pesos.  And for that, I will interview the person who had the unique privilege of bestowing the latest offering. 

In atypical form, I am going to spare someone's balls from being busted.  Today, this lucky person will remain 'anonymous', in order to protect him/her from public taunting and ridicule.  The remainder of this post will refer to the person involved as 'Pepe'

Jen: Tell me, Pepe; what happened last Friday as you were driving downtown to pick up Brook?
Pepe: So, I was driving next to a transit cop for about five blocks; directly on his left side.  All of a sudden, he slammed on his brakes.  I kept rolling and then realized that he stopped for some people to cross the street. 
Jen: What happened next?
Pepe: I thought, ahhh shit! Here we go.
Jen: And then?
Pepe: Sure enough, I looked in my rear view mirror and he was pulling me over.
Jen: Were you scared?
Pepe: I was a little nervous of course, but more worried about the rest of my day because I was on my way to surf.
Jen: So what did he pull you over for?
Pepe: He told me that I have to stop for people who want to cross the street.
Jen: Did you ask him if he has ever tried to cross the street while walking in Mexico; and have a car stop?
Pepe: No, I thought to myself; my experience of walking and crossing the street in Mexico is a free-for-all. 
Jen: Did you get a ticket?
Pepe: He took my license and told me I had to go to the police station to pick it up; and pay 800 pesos.  He took my license and left.  After a few minutes, he came back to my car.  He asked me where I lived and worked.  He went back to his car, once again.  After speaking on his radio, he returned and told me he was going to give me a break and give me a warning. 
Jen: Wow, you sure are lucky; and you didn't even have to bribe your way out of the ticket!
Pepe: But he did say, "if you want you can give me a tip". 
Jen: WTF? Seriously? And did you tip him?
Pepe: Being scared and nervous about the cop knowing I live around town; and excited that I got my license back, I  pulled out my wallet and tried to give him the smallest bill I had in my wallet.
Jen: Which was?
Pepe: 100 pesos.
Jen: So, you just handed him the money and drove off?
Pepe: I handed him the money and he said "no"; "place my tip in this book and hand it back to me".  And, that is what I did.
Jen: Do I understand correctly?, you tipped a police officer for pulling you over?

And so it goes. Life doesn't really function like it does back in the States; that is the beauty and the excitement of this whole adventure.  Once you think you have the hang of it; a feel for it; a sense of how it rolls, you get another surprise. 

The etymology of the word 'tip' as related to gratuity is not clear, but it is thought that it derived in the 16th century; to strike or hit smartly but lightly.  If this phrase origin is correct, than I will make sure that the next time, Mr. Policeman asks for a tip, I will be sure to give it to him; rather than our hard earned pesos.